Wednesday, February 5, 2014


     Relationships made in heaven or in dot com heaven can come crashing down to earth, and when they do, it can be a disaster worth seeking Federal aid for.  Makes you wonder if there ever was a relationship in the first place or if you were just in la la land riding high on a fantasy.  You could have sworn that God sent you Prince Charming or Sleeping Beauty and well, hey, she sleeps all the time.  And well yes, he is charming all the time, but that’s about it! So what are you complaining about?  God did you send you Prince Charming and Sleeping Beauty.  But you wanted more than a fairy tale relationship, right?

     So what about soulmates?

     For a long time I thought soulmates was a bunch of hogwash.  You can tell just how old I am.  How about a bunch of bunk?  More poetic than hogwash!  But I have been fortunate to experience a soulmate, so now I have to swallow my bunch of bunk.  And even soulmates live in a body!  Yes, a body, that sometimes is sick, broken, not-so-toned, blind, deaf, falling apart, wrinkled, ovulating, in pain-triggering nastiness, and well, you know, everything else that comes with a body working or not.  And even soulmates have a brain which has it’s own quirky quacky, quocky, neurons, firing and misfiring.  Even soulmates live very unsoulfully and treat their loved ones in unsoulful ways.

     So what’s my point?  We can avoid the “hard wark” as an Irishman once said, the “hard wark” of relationships by insisting that our relationship is made in heaven or that we are soulmates.  And why do we do that?  That is a complicated question for another blog!  But we do, and ironically the “hard wark” we try to avoid doesn’t have to be so hard or difficult or painful.  

     It can be as simply as being conscious, being aware, being awake.

     I can remain conscious of the other’s quirks, quacks, and quocks and rather than “warking” hard to somehow get or make my partner change, I can "wark" hard to learn to live with the real person I chose to love, to enjoy those quirks, quacks, and quocks, to see them as precious, to learn to be responsive to them and yes, that is hard “wark.”

     Hard “wark” but not a crash, not a disaster.  In fact it can become the delight of my day.

     And this wonderfilled book will walk you through the hard "wark" Irish or not.


No comments:

Post a Comment